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Thursday, 18 December 2014

Is Your Marriage a Battleground? An Open #Letter to #Violent Husbands

The high rate of violence against married women has prompted this strongly-worded letter.

Dear Husband,
If your reaction at every provocation is to throw a punch in your wife's face, you need help. You know why? Because you are a weakling!

Beating up a woman you vowed to cherish and love ranks as the worst crime and it isn't a sign of strength, but a sign of weakness and cowardice.

Ask yourself, do you throw a punch at every man who annoys you in your office and on the street? If your answer is a no, you have to seek help today!

And please don't lecture me on how your wife is a nagging idiot or how she is abusive, or doesn't cook for you or disrespects you.

Listen to me, there's not a single reason good enough for you to abuse your position of authority as head of the home to inflict physical or emotional harm on your wife. Shame on you!

All hope isn't lost.

There are many actions you can take to manage your stubborn wife. So many steps, none of which involves  beating her up.

Take a moment to think!

1. You have got to check your actions. Do you do things that make your wife so mad, she insults you and you end up giving her a punch to shut her up?

2. Okay, here are a list of top annoying habits. Do any of them sound familiar?

3. You constantly come back home late. Many women won't put up with this for too long. Women want and need attention. Get back home!

4. You come up with every excuse in the book not to give money to run the home. Well...if you have financial troubles, don't keep it a secret. Share before she finds out.

5. You guard your mobile phone as if your life depends on it. Your action arouses her suspicion. And, once jealousy creeps in, you can no longer do anything right. Your home becomes a battlefield.

6. You don't help with house chores - cooking, taking care of the kids and running the home in general. Think about your wife doing the house chores, shopping, cooking, looking after the kids, going to work and you expect her to be ready and randy when you drop in at night? Is she superwoman? What planet are you on? Get real!

This doesn't apply if you have maids.

7. You don't spend weekends at home or your days off are so fully booked, your wife is now a decorative item in your home. Her birthdays are forgotten, anniversaries are not in your scheme of busy schedule, the kids birthdays are overrun by important meetings. HA! You are breeding a very discontent woman and soon, the cauldron is going to explode in your busy face!

8. Allowing family interference in your marriage is not only wrong, it will cause an explosion! You are the head of your home, not your mother, father, brothers or sisters. They need to get a life and leave you to work with your wife to create the home you both want. Are you still reading? If you are, there is  hope.

Here are a few tips to help you win your wife;

1. If your wife starts her rant, give her full attention. She is telling you the wrong way, but she is communicating, so LISTEN!

2. Breathe in and out, pick out the message (s) listed in her long rant. Acknowledge her annoyance. You have to AGREE she has a basis to be angry, if you want world PEACE.

3. In charming words, admit you HATE upsetting her. Even if you think she is over the top. Tell your wife she makes your heart beat so fast, you feel faint, or any compliment that drifts into your head. You've got to diffuse the tension. It takes two to fight.

4. Ask her what she wants you to do to make her HAPPY. She would probably collapse from shock. Buy her a gift.

5. Later on, talk about what ticked her off in plain terms. Give reasons why you come home late, or can't help with chores... Or save the chat till tomorrow when your wife is in a lighter mood.

6. Agree to take steps to make her happy. If you come home late everyday, you've got to cutback on whatever it is that keeps you outside your home.

Each quarrel with your wife gives you an opportunity to change things, to do things in a different way to make the other person happy. It is NOT an opportunity to hold on to grudges.

Remember, once you have had a fight over a specific issue, try not to repeat the same offence. Nothing is as damaging as broken trust.

If you feel pushed to the point you want to hit your wife, go for a WALK. You need a clear head. By the time you get back, the angry steam is gone.

After taking the steps above and your wife remains uncontrollable, report her to someone she holds in high esteem. Take this action only as a DESPERATE measure.

If you don't know how to pray, grab a bible and open to Matthew 7: 9 - 13.

God ordained marriage, I know if you call on Him to fix your marriage, He will.

Thank you for reading through this letter. You are a stronger man than you know.

I wish you the very best as you chart a new life of Peace, Love, Stability and Fun with your wife.

Thank you for stopping by. It would be sweet if you left comments, so I know you dropped in.

Have a fabulous weekend.



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