Twenty-four year old Rebecca's insecurities about her physical appearance came to light as she sat side by side with twenty-one year old Amy Willerton, Miss Universe (GB) who was clad in skimpy bikini showing off her perfectly shaped figure to the hilt.
She says once she steps out of the shower or pool, she grabs a towel to cover up!
I've got a burn scar on my leg and so does my teenage daughter! The scar doesn't stop me wearing short dresses or skirts. I'm still counselling my daughter to accept her scar, to live with it and to love herself.
MY ADVICE TO BECKY & OTHERS :
Never take criticism about your physical appearance to heart because beauty isn't skin deep!
Know that many 'perfect looking' models, beauty queens and actresses suffer from insecurities about their appearance too.
Hey! We can't all be the same size, shape and height, no matter how hard we try. Accept that you're more than the way you look. You've got personality, character, attitude, values and belief.
Don't expect everyone to cheer you on. The more successful you are, the more a few charlatans want to pull you down. The best way to slice a woman to size is to throw digs about her figure. Ignore them.
If you can do something about your weight, go ahead. If you've tried and lost, move on and love yourself.
Amy and Rebecca have been lovely examples of beauty and depth.
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24 comments:
Easier said than done. Women, especially those in power are always judged by their looks, take female politicians for example. It is a sexist world...meant to exclude the majority. #WLC Connect
Huge thanks thereporterandthegirl.com for sharing your views.
You're absolutely right, men in power are never torn apart for their pot belly for example but women are constantly jeered at. I'm so glad you stepped in here to add your voice. Nice to connect.
Well said Stella but we really can't separate women from how they feel about their physical apperance. The key is loving yourself the way you are and stop wishing you were someone else. 'Easier said' but its the truth. Deal with it.
Aha! My point exactly. We've got to live with what we can't change about ourselves. Thank you, Omolara for adding your view point. It is always appreciated.
Thank you, Angel. Fun to get connected.
Always a pleasure to stop by.
Great post Stella,
Life would be so much easier if we believed the good stuff over the bad most of the time. Great advice. It's the implementing of it that makes things a little tricky.
Thanks a lot, Nana. It's a conscious decision we have to make to focus on the positives and accept our physical scars or insecurities as part of life. I do enjoy reading your opinion, Nana.
Sigh. In my experience, as a mother of two, I find myself constantly feeling insecure about my weight, especially with the myriad of 'she lost all the baby weight' celebrity stories out there. There was even a recent internet sensation that went viral- a gorgeous, fit and trim mother of three with the caption 'what's your excuse?' written on the poster. Double sigh.
As much as I may want to love myself there are moments when I look in the mirror and all I feel is loathing. It takes the very speacial grace of God and love from important people in your life to pull one through those low times.
Thanks for this piece, Stella!
It's a lovely post, Stella. Beauty is certainly not skin deep :-)
How honest of you, Sifa. You're a star! Last night, my younger sister and I were discussing our husbands adoring take on the size of our tummies. My hubby plays with my 'cutely' protruding belly and my son blows wind on my navel.
They have helped me love my belly and my scarred and hairy leg. You're right, we need important people to assure us that we're beautiful despite our imperfection.
About eight years ago, I paid six months membership fee in a gym. Guess what? My hubby made sure I didn't attend the gym sessions. He said, 'You're a mother, you're not going for a beauty pageant! I don't expect you to be as slim as you were before we got married'.
We'll be married fourteen years in a few days and I haven't been 'allowed' in the gym by my hubby! Now, I love myself. My hubby is a huge factor in helping me accept that my stomach isn't ever going to be a surfboard like that of the Celeb mums that 'drain' the baby fat. Many Celebs go for tummy tuck!
You and I are in the same boat, Sifa. Celebrate your kids and take consolation from being a special Mum. Every woman's body is different. You're lovely and hopefully, the important people in your life will learn to accept and love you as you are.
Sifa, I can't thank you enough for being so open and sharing your insecurity. I'm very grateful.
Thank you, Empi for joining in. Other attributes define who we are. Discovering that truth is a personal journey.
I found your great blog through the WLC Blog Follows on the World Literary Cafe! Great to connect!
Thank you, Joyce. Glad you connected. Nice to meet you.
Food for thought, Stella. I have to admit there are moments when I wish I had a different body. But those moments are fleeting.
Oh Kiru, this write up is aimed at provoking our thoughts and to help us face and accept our imperfections. Being a mother sure brings with it physical changes that are difficult to swallow, but that's life. Other problems also leaves men and women with scars too. I guess we all have that 'fleeting' moment of 'I wish...'
I'm very pleased you added your voice. Thank you for sharing, Kiru.
though athletic, I was a skinny kid and always very self-conscious about having no visible muscles. I was strong & fast, and agile and dexterous, but skinny. That bothered me up until I was about 40 and finally began gaining weight. Then I worked to keep it OFF!
Hello Jeff, welcome to our chat. Very happy to have male input to our conversation.
My ten year old son feels he's skinny. He asks when he can go into the gym to acquire abs!!! I didn't know young boys and men were as sensitive as teen girls and women.
I'm relieved to read that you've gained weight and your insecurities have tailed off. Kudos!
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with us.
your son won't believe it at that age -- because I never did when people told me -- but he will feel fortunate (later in life) that his metabolism keeps him slender. The more weight young kids carry, the more medical problems they have later in life --- generally speaking.
Samuel Osa-Iyoha says (on Whatsapp):
Everyone should make some effort on how they look, indiscipline is something most of us allow to overtake us, especially ladies..
Its common knowledge that when you eat late you gain weight, when you can't take your eyes of chocolate, you sure become bigger, let's not make excuses and allow fat consume our self confidence, fat has no good intention for humans...
A Little effort will go a long way !!!
Yes Jeff, I have told him he is perfect without the fat. He's very active and fit. But as always, the young are eager to grow up.
I'll remind him when he grows up. Many thanks for your feedback.
Thank you, Samuel for joining in.
With chocolate all around and other comfort food, is it any wonder many people find it tough to turn away? Many women are too busy juggling work, going shopping and taking care of their families to squeeze in going to the gym. It is a huge challenge that remains to be conquered.
What I find important as an issue here is not the beauty of the body but the word insecure. Why should a woman or man feel insecure? To me, if a married woman/man still feels insecure, they may have their eyes on 'greener pastures'.
For those who are still single, their insecurities are being driven by peer pressure and rotten societal values. Every woman or man should be content with how they look if they can't help it.
In an attempt for people to look like their role model or other admired Celebrity, they turn to cosmetic surgery. This usually leads to further medical complications. On a final note, what does anyone really want to look like? Perfection?
My gorgeous Love, thank you for stepping in to air your opinion on this touchy subject.
No one can gain perfection. We've just got to learn to love ourselves the way we are. Thanks for helping me love my imperfections. You're my inspiration.
I Love you forever. xxx
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